I seem to have found myself in a state of deep depression. it comes and goes as it pleases but i have been in this one more out of wanting to feel it for it's the only feeling i will let out of my locked up doors where only one key will set the rest free though i fear to do so myself. i fear to let them out of fear that if i were to do so that all i would receive in return is pain. i wrote a poem when i was in this state earlier; its called untitled because a title tells you what the material means and since i highly doubt anyone truly understands me i have left it as such: untitled. i won't talk about it here because if you can understand it then you can understand me and that would mean that i am not alone, which would be allowing myself a false hope. i had once wished that there was someone that did understand me and knew how i felt but that small hope is wilting away. like a dieing rose, that hope loses life with each passing moment, leaving nothing but dead pedals as a remembrance.